Good day, kitties. This is Romeo coming to you today from the Terrace Cafe with interviews with cats who have opinions about issues of importance. We go now to Omar with a "Cat in the Cafe" interview conducted in his inimitable style. What's the question du jour, Omar? Omar:  This is your Cat in the Cafe repurrter, Omar, along with my nutso, er, um trusted sidekick, Romeo. Each month I`ll be randomly talking with cats to get tips & viewpoints on very important topics. This month's question is ... What would you say is the best time to cause havoc in your household? And here to answer is Sheik Ollie Babble. (Sheik Ollie Babble and Omar) Omar:  Your Sheikyness, what do you say is the best time to cause havoc in your household? Sheik:  Wowza! Dis beez an eesy question fur me, da Sheik Ollie Babble. Eggzactly 3 AM iz my time to howl. I rips da dishrag offa my head, den I beez all black and I kan tear up da house and run run fast! Omar:  Explain why this time is the best. Sheik:  No cat or mom kan see me in da dark. MOL Dats how I gott to be Bad To The Bone! Omar:  Thank you, Sheik, this be a good tip for other black cats. I think I'll join this group over here and help them eat their chicken while they answer. (Mewsette, E.T., Phelicity, and Ginger) Omar:  And what do you think is the best time to cause havoc in your household, Mewsette? Mewsette:  Oh yes, my furry best time is precisely 3 AM! Some humans might be sleepin and not notice, but mine isn't, I see to that. I'm 18, so I don't do nothin physical, but that's when I sing opera! I perform the most heart-rending loud, clear, high soprano Madame Butterfly mew efur heard! Mew know, the final scene, where she dies? I am soooo good at it! Efen my mom says I am. Sometimes I go to the back door so my audience in the yard can hear me. Might be just a sleepy bunny and a couple doodlebugs out there, but I gif it my all! If they ask purrlitely, I'll sing Carmen fur an encore. My mom would be disappointed if I didn't, I can tell by the way she groans. Phelicity:  Wellllll, da funnest time fur me to make a ruckus is right after my breakfast. Soon as I eiffur eats it or refuses to eats it, whichefur I'm in da mood fur, is when I start my Myow-wow-wows and tearing back and forth thru da house. I knocks ofur whatefur I can manage, but I'm a real liddle kitty and that's not much. I plays race car, vroom! splat! That's if I skids into a wall sometimes. ouch! I keep it up till my mom opens da door to my enclosed porch so I gets to go out there. That's what da ruckus was fur. It works gooooood. Ginger:  I much prefur 6am. Da sun is coming up but da humans are still in bed. I do my best to get dem up so we can all watch da sunrise together. I efen brought a mouse into der bedroom da other morning, thinking they might wake up if they had something to play wiff. Well, dey did wake up, after I ran laps up and over dem while I were chasing da mouse, but dey just watched fur a liddle while den daddy took a broom and got my mouse and threw it outside. Sigh. I will keep trying. E.T.:  I'm usually at Paddy's most of da night, so I sleep late in da mornings. I'm starting to feel better about noon. Dis is when I wanna run thru the house and chase my sisfur. It helps work off my hangovers, MOL! Omar:  Thanks!   Four cats. Four fascinating opinions. Now let's see what these young tomz think. Max Taylor and Jordan are two years old and best furriends who are giving their meowmies reason to experience the full horror of the "terrible twos". (Omar, Max Taylor, and Jordan) Max:  Now altho morning times are great my philosophy is that anytime--day or night--is the best time for causing havoc around the house! At my house I have a sisfur named Samantha who is just as mischievious as myself so we cause trouble together a lot of times! She is okay for a gurl in that respect! I love getting into the cabinets and throwing stuff out on the floor. Another fun thing is jumping up on the tables or counters and seeing how many things you can knock off--they all make a unique noise when they hit the floor! This always causes Mommy to come running so it helps to keep her in shape too. You would think she would say "thanks!" Jordan:  Fur myown self da bess timez to makez trouble and iz boutz 4 or 5 AM in da morning here at myown house. My own Mommy and sisfurs are many fast asleep and comfy and I catches dem off guard ebbery time do dat why diz da bestest time! I furst getz on da bed and ruffles da feffers of any of my sisfurs sleeping soundly in diz liddle fleece bed at da foot ob da bed. Dey getz up or betfur, growls or hissez waking Mommy up! Mommy yells out and den iffen I iz close she makes me goez off da bed. Den I waitz til ebberybody calm agin and startz running threw da house and back into da bedroom and getz behind da blindz in da windowz making rattling noises. Finally, affer all diz usually Mommy getz up cuz she can'tz sleepz no more. When she do, she checkz our fud bowls and we getz an early breakfast! Omar:  Gives me faith in the future to hear such words from youngsters like Max and Jordan. Just think -- Jordan won the Bad to the Bone award when he was only one year old! What will he be like at full maturity!?! There you have it, interesting answers/opinions from interesting cats. Mmmmmmm, how come no one asked us questions? Oh well, this is Omar signing off with "Good day & have a good nap in your human's underwear drawer." Er, ummm. Very interesting answers to an impurrtant question, and some good advice from an exceptional repurrter. This is Anchorcat Romeo. 'Bye fur now! If you'd like to be interviewed, contact the Editors. 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