Hadarah: Ah jimmied the lock with your Catinum card, and why not? Ah haven't been able to make charges on it lately because they mewed it was maxed out.

Taliesin: Maxed out? You stole our Catinum and maxed it?

Hadarah: Don't shake so much; your fur will fall out. And don't worry. Ah phoned the Catinum company and told them to triple the limit.

Dwnn: Triple the limit? On our card that you stole and maxed out! That's it! I'm cancelling it today.

Taliesin: Why are you dressed that way, little sisfur? Where did all these nipzpagne bottles come from -- as if I don't know they came from the klubb wine cellar! Have you and the Tortie Swat Team been having a party in our office? And the nerve of putting your picture on our office wall!

Hadarah: Don't be silly. There's only nipzpagne fur moi. Observe that there's only one goblet. And you need more beauty in your office so Ah put up my portrait.

Ah got thirsty waiting fur you to show up. Ah want you to paw a special article fur the Caterwaul. Ah want you to let your readers know they now can have pink pawnails or purple pawnails or red pawnails or they can have blue pawnails if they purrfur.

Taliesin: What's this about pawnail colors? Most of our readers are toms!

Hadarah: Then they can have plain nails or blue-fur-boys nails. Tomz have sisfurs who like purrty nails. Besides, it's not just about beauty. It's about amputations!

Soft Claws® makes nail caps fur cats. Shelters report that the most common reason people leave their cats there is because of their clawing furniture. You have your claws, but Ah don't because my furst humans loved their sofa cover more than they loved me. *sob*

Wicked Twins: Don't cry, little sisfur. We'll take care of you, and we'll tell our readers how to have colored pawnails. Then their meowmies and fahfurs can tell other humans. If only one kitty is saved from declawing, we will feel purroud to have helped.

BTW:  Your old furmily is in London now and if they get another kitty, they won't be able to have it declawed. Vets in the UK don't declaw on humane grounds.

Hadarah: Fangu, brofurs. You're so good and kind and generous to me. That's what Ah told Freya when Ah sent her that cask of Amontillado. Several of us girls are getting together later, and Freya was afraid she might run out of sherry.

Knew you wouldn't mind. 'Bye now, don't wait up fur me!

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